• Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price


  • Cassette + Digital Album

    The final tape of the primary-color trio has arrived at last. 5 hot tracks, doubled on both sides. Cover as always by Susan Dickson-Nadeau, recorded and mixed as always by Nick Schauld. Complete the collection and give yourself something new to groove to.

    Includes unlimited streaming of PLASTIC HEAP via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 7 days
    7 remaining

      $3 USD or more 


all I want to know is, how much do you hate yourself? All I want to know is, why do you need me to hate myself? It's un-resolution, far from solution, what's the solution, there's no solution. I can't help you help yourself. Show me more, but not more of this. I want more, but not more of this. Left behind, not self-sufficient, bleak promises ring in my head. Stand back until you work this out and don't drag me down. You can't stand on my feet and ask me why I'm not moving on.
I am terrified constantly from being taught I am too much to be loved by the people who told me they loved me most. I can't teach you how to feel it. I thought I could show you how to feel it. I think part of me knew that you couldn't see me as any more than a faint outline of yourself. I'm here; are you? I was your mud to mold and manipulate. You say you do this in whose best interest? I move forward and you just move on. Don't leave me in the dark. It was so lonely being with you. It was fucking lonely being with you. Don't call it love; it's just cathexis.
I'm living in fear but isn't that always the way that it goes? I trust no one but isn't that always the way that it goes? Another problem I can't solve, you can't trust yourself to trust the right ones. God I hate fucking. When people treat you like you have to prove something, god I hate fucking. I can't sleep around it.
We have been holding these hurts to our chests. We aren't letting this go away. We owe you nothing, you owe us everything. We are your problem now. Get out of our house, get off of our stage, take a fucking look at yourself. We are not who you have made us. We all know your goddamn rap sheet. We owe you nothing, you owe us everything. We are taking back what's ours. If you still want to call yourself a "good guy," get out of my face, make something of yourself. Don't wait for someone to tell you again. Don't make me tell you again. We will survive you.
The only time I ever lied was every time I said I was okay. I'm sorry I'm not better. Maybe I should be better. Crying in offices rewriting my past, relearning to feel it all. I can't employ someone to save me. I have to do it myself. When was the last time I had an honest conversation with my body?


released March 16, 2017




PLASTIC HEAP Columbus, Ohio

"shitty freaks in a straight-ass world"

kk they/them
moira she/her
patrick he/him
alex he/him

OCT 9 2015 - OCT 19 2017

contact / help


Streaming and
Download help

Report this album or account

PLASTIC HEAP recommends:

If you like PLASTIC HEAP, you may also like: